You are a Liar

I am too. That’s right; we are all liars. Especially when we understand the most simple and accurate definition of a liar: “One who lies”. Liar is one of those words which can spark a deeply emotional response. Almost everyone wants to believe that they are not a liar, but are instead a completely honest person who always tells the truth. If you tell yourself that, sorry, but you are lying to yourself. And that is a bigger problem.

To really understand what a liar truly is, we have to define what lying is exactly. Defining a lie is a bit more complicated that defining a liar. Lie: “A knowingly false or inaccurate statement (written or verbal) made with the intent to deceive”. Here’s where it gets muddy for most of us; the different kinds of lies. There is a fib, a half-truth, an exaggeration, white lies, bold-face lies, fabrications and omissions, just to name a few. It is true that there are many socially acceptable reasons to lie. The one element that is essential to all lies is the knowledge of the liar that he or she is in fact not telling the truth.

Lying is essential to our own personal survival and acceptance in any society. There are many valid and noble reasons to lie. One example is self-preservation. Another is protecting the feelings or well-being of another. Although those are some pretty good reasons, they are still lies if we know our statement to be untrue. Consequently, even though our reasons may be sound, it is still a lie, and that makes us liars.

We don’t have to lie all day long in every conversation to be a liar. Studies on lying are all over the map. But most legitimate studies estimate that on average, people lie between 3 to 8 times daily. But, I think we have all known people that blow those statistics out of the water. People that seem to lie most of the time, without any discernable benefit to themselves or others, are called pathological liars. That is a psychological/mental disorder, and is a whole other can of worms that I will leave closed, for now.

See how long you can go without lying. Pay close attention to every word you say or write. Unless you stay in bed all day with all of your communications devices turned off, your doors locked and have absolutely no contact with anyone else, I think you might be surprised at the results. If you can honestly make it through a normal day in your normal life around other people without lying, not even once, you will be my new hero.

I believe if a person were to never lie under any circumstances, ever, even the acceptable lies, that person would be sad and lonely in life…not to mention discouraged and generally disliked.

I have just now decided that I no longer think of myself as a liar, because that moniker cuts so deeply. So now I see myself as: “One who occasionally practices beneficial deception in an effort to protect myself or others from experiencing the pain that the truth would certainly cause”. Sure, it’s a little wordy, but it feels a helluva lot more honorable than believing I’m a liar.

The antonym for a lie is: The truth. And, the truth hurts, or it will set you free. In my experience, it can sometimes do a little of both. Since we can’t realistically be completely honest and truthful at all times and in all situations, try to lie less often. And when you must lie, be unselfish and kind with your words and make sure you are speaking from your heart, and that your lie is based in love. Star out.

 Filed under: Philosophy & Psychology

8 Comments

obsrvantlouie: Hahaha

O a belly laugh; "“One who occasionally practices beneficial deception"

I look forward to adding the phrase to my list of confounding phrases....yes, I get enjoyment from perplexing people with language.

I am unemployed because I called a spade a spade; I don't care about your feelings because I live to speak the truth. Yes the truth hurts but hiding it from you hurts me more. I hate being in situations where I "can't be myself", however, I removed the word can't from my vocabulary long ago because I feel I CAN do anything. Therefore, I also removed myself from situations where speaking the truth is frowned upon.....yes; socially speaking - you could say I live a boring life - because it seems most persons on this earth are fucking retarded and cannot hold an intellectual or progressive conversation.

I seek truth, love polemic and live to understand what is truly true.

I am a liar....I lie to persons who do not understand the true nature of reality.....persons who worry constantly....these persons I lie to because I spoke the truth they would then worry and their worry would have a negative effect on the reality I am trying to create.

Lying is the reason I am now an entrepreneur because I would not lie in order to close a sale....I l WOULD not lie to kissy kissy my "management team". Truth is uncomfortable at times....butt don't get mad at me because 2 + 2 = 4. I would not eat shit from a domineering disrespectful customer (nobody talks to me like that).

I would say that I do fib sometimes.....NOT BECAUSE I want to hide the truth from hurting your feelings but because i don't want to waste my time and yours explaining a concept that feeble, pretentious and scared minds cannot comprehend....I have better things to do withy time...therefor sparingly I will fib if I am not in the mood to receive pleasure from discombobulating you.

Absolutely wonderful start to the weekend.

Great article!

Starperson: Motivational, OL

Your comments make me want to stand up the next time I am in a room full of people, any people, and proclaim loudly and proudly: "Hi, my name is Star, and I am a liar." Then I would say some OL stuff until the cops come and haul me off. Now, that was funny!

It is obvious that your comments here were intended to help yourself become my newest hero. I don't blame you. Keep trying, and we'll see. Peace to you, OL. ;-)

Jaxon: Liar

I have always been told I have no filter when i speak and i should not say whatever pops in my head. I say "bullshit", it is just not logical at all to sugar coat what im thinking which i know to be the truth. I am unsure of what my mission is here but i know all to well what it is NOT. say what you mean and mean what you say.

UN.i1-PHI: liar illusion

great post Star!

Tarheel: Liar, liar, pants on fire.

Oh dang it. Happy to see your safe return.
"How the hell are ya?"

Here's a RARE clip that pertains to your post....you must at least either watch/listen or fast fwd to the 57 second mark.....http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtTGfWDamVE

Nice coiffure, eh!

I especially dig OL's comments defending himself & his propensity for NOT telling the truth (you better laugh,OL becuz this is one of the funniest digs I've done in a while).

obsrvantlouie: Another belly laugh

Thanks Tar ;)

Starperson: Yep, back safe and still GROUNDED

You know the answer to you own question: "How the hell are you?" Answer: "Wyatt, I am rolling." - Doc Holliday, Tombstone.

Three Dog Night? Perfect on many levels. Thanks.

I have been on a brief journey of self discovery. Primarily attempting to understand my own heart. I highly recommend it. Peace.

TillToTheWhen: and I thought I was honest...

How do we know that you're not lying about us all being liars? : )

I am honest and explain everything to the best of my ability. The english language was created to separate us apart. It is impossible to put truth into words, but I try my best. I am BRUTALLY HONEST and if it means I get in trouble, so bet it. Sure, I've lied in the past, but I don't lie to people anymore. No reason for it IMO

Nice article though

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