Trust is Overrated
Who do you trust? I mean really trust. You must have a mental list. It most likely consists of some of the individuals in your life and possibly some professions in general. Let’s see, you might trust your family, your partner, or your best friend. Could it be someone you connected with online? Others you may have trust for in general are people like doctors, firemen, teachers and maybe your priest, rabbi, minister or pastor.
We can decide to trust anyone we choose to; right up until that trust is betrayed. Our list begins to shrink when we are lied to, cheated on, stolen from or otherwise deceived. Once our trust has been violated by someone we love or respect, it is nearly impossible to return to the relationship we once had. It also causes us so much more emotional, spiritual and mental anguish when our trust is betrayed by someone close to us. Someone we have given our complete trust to.
The anger, confusion and pain we experience is magnified when we consider ourselves to be trustworthy. Almost all of us believe we are worthy of trust. There exists a place in all of our minds that actually wants to trust others. But, trust is a fragile illusion that is easily broken. When you learn not to trust, you cannot feel betrayed.
The more life experiences we have, the more likely we are to have been hurt by trusting someone without reservation. Trust is a choice, a belief. It is a verb and a noun. Trust is imaginary. Trust exists only in our minds.
Take another look at the short list of “trustworthy” people and professions I suggested in the beginning of this piece. How many of times have you had your heart broken or started questioning your choice of people in your trusted circle?
My suggestion: Trust no one, but have love for everyone. Don’t allow anybody to have the kind power over you that you must give to them when you trust them completely. You can love them with all of your heart, but do not trust them. You can have confidence in them and their actions, but reserve your complete trust for just one.
God, you say? Why not? After all, it is written on U.S. currency for God’s sake. If you have faith and are a believer in your God, go ahead and trust him/her/ it to always have your best interest in mind. But when your world is turned upside down time after time by devastating events that are out of your control, say some more prayers and expect better times ahead. Although, I believe that is simply delusional optimism. But hey, we all have very different learning curves, right?
No, I believe there is only one entity you can trust completely: Yourself. You and only you know your own heart. You may think you know the heart of another, but that too is a wishful delusion we create to help us feel needed, wanted and connected. Trust only your own intuition. You will make mistakes, but you will not feel betrayed.
Someone here please tell me I’m wrong! Better yet, show me where I’m wrong. Even better yet…prove it!
Written with love and light…and a total lack of trustworthiness. StarFiled under: Philosophy & Psychology, Trust
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